it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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