try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
