I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
