I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
