Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Dicks are not precious.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I think I just sharted jello shots
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