I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
