You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I cut my penus on the lid.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
