Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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