The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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