I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
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I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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