i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
