i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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