You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
i think i have herpe
just one?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
