You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
