i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
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