Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize