did you get engaged???
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
