you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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