youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
