Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
