He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
