my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
