none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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