kristin has been a bad kristin
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
That's how pantless uber rides happen
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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