Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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