You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
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