found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
