You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
