You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
It's just like the Real World with babies
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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