I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
he was CRYING into my vagina
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
