what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
