I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
