So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
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