OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I just made out with a guy for $7.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
