Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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