The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
