Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
