i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
She's better-looking with the mask on.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
