Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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