TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Randomize
