I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Randomize
