in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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