As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
