If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
