oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
