every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I love how my cats smell like pot.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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