Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Randomize
