One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
