I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
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