You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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