Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
