no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize