Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
